MagicianThe magician is a person who realises that he is broken. Having experienced such a realisation, he is unable to do anything but strive to fix himself. Sometimes this striving becomes too much for him. If, rather than make himself whole, he has patched himself together like a broken clay pot reassembled with the aid of Blu Tack and Pritt Stick, he is liable to fall apart under the strain and end up in a worse situation than he was when he started. More likely, he will attempt to hide his broken nature from himself through the performance of empty rituals designed to convince that nagging part of his mind that he really is doing something about the problem. In time, the nagging will cease and he will forget why he started the rituals in the first place; then he will either grow bored of them and dismiss the whole episode as a fanciful phase, now long behind him, or he will continue the rituals for their own sake.

The force by which a person is driven to fix himself is directly proportional to the degree to which he perceives himself to be broken. Many people, recognising flaws in themselves, deem them of little import, perhaps interesting character quirks, and feel no desire to change them. Others may wish to change them but believe that change is not possible. The former may be a more palatable expression of the latter. For some, their broken nature drives them to seek help and, having received help from others, they look to others in order to gauge their recovery. When their helper tells them that they are helped, or when they perceive themselves to be on a par with their peers, they consider themselves fixed.

The successful magician, however, for one reason or another, obtains a clearer insight into his broken nature than most. Thus he may begin with a common goal, of the sort provided by a parish priest or psychoanalyst, but upon achieving that goal, if he even retains it for that long, as it is likely to transmute quickly and he may not even have known what it was when he started, he knows that he is not yet fixed and continues to strive for something greater.

We are all broken. Some of us revel in it, some of us suppress it, some of us rectify it, some of us do all three. Most probably don’t realise it, which would explain why most magicians are more obviously crazy than the rest.

Published in: on February 21, 2007 at 12:00 am  Comments (6)  

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6 CommentsLeave a comment

  1. this is perhaps one of the more lucid essays on the subject of Initiation I have read. I hope you publish it elsewhere also.

  2. I agree completely with Apotropos’ comment, excellent essay that certainly is understood to be true by all real magicians. I’ve also always said that in order to become a real magician you have to be somehow broken, but I don’t think I could’ve written this down so clearly.Lucid, as said.

  3. Yes, your words ring true – broken we are and crazy… but in our madness we can create life that is worth to live.

  4. i enjoyed that very much, thank you.

  5. Very interesting! Yes, that ‘will to change’ something about ourselves may be what inspires us to drive our Will towards Xeper (willed conscious evolution). But we may be also inspired to strengthen something that already exists within ourselves, but could be much more advanced. Either way, change is going on.

  6. […] (Naudhiz) to know, because the alternative was self-destruction. A good foundation for a vitki, as one such has well expressed: The magician is a person who realises that he is broken. Having experienced such […]

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